Bonnie Weiss, LCSW and Jay Earley, Ph.D.
The Molder Inner Critic tries to fit you into a certain mold, or get you to be a certain way: caring, aggressive, polite, outgoing, artistic, meek. It compares you to other people whom it admires. It holds you up to expectations that originated with your parents, community, heritage, or culture, though it has internalized these and integrated them as its own values. It attacks you when you don’t fit the mold, and praises you when you do.
Your Molder may want you to fit in so you will be liked and admired. It may want to protect you from being abandoned, rejected, judged, or shamed if you step out of line. If you are still in the same family situation or subculture in your adult life, there’s a possibility this is happening right now. However, even if you are not, the Molder doesn’t realize this, and it tries to keep you in line even though it is no longer necessary.
Different Molder parts enforce wildly varying values. One may attack you for showing anger; another for showing sensitivity. One may judge you for feeling pain or being vulnerable; another for grabbing too much attention. Some Molders value emotional expression, and castigate you for being cold and unfeeling. Others value intellect and stoicism, and judge you for showing any emotions at all. Some Molders want you to be competitive in the world and make a lot of money; others want you to live a frugal life and give most of your money to the poor.
You might have a Molder part whose job is just to keep you in your usual identity, holding normal beliefs about who you are, consistent with ordinary modern culture. If you start to open up emotionally/spiritually, or transform your consciousness, the Molder may attack you to prevent change; afraid that this will leave you confused and lost.
Transform Your Critic
Learn how to explore your Inner Critic and transform it using Internal Family Systems Therapy, a new cutting-edge method. Read our book, Freedom from you Your Inner Critic.
Learn how to awaken the Inner Champion you need for each of the seven types of Inner Critics. You create a profile of what nurturing and encouraging messages your Inner Champion gives you and what it looks like. This will help you evoke your Inner Champion to support you in your life. Read our book Activating Your Inner Champion Instead of Your Inner Critic.
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